The single most important question you should ask yourself

When we feel stuck on something we want to do, the first question that might come to mind is:

How do I…?


How can I…?

For instance:

How can I get more clients?

How can I write a book?

How can I change careers?

But I think that underneath that question, there is a much more powerful one, that we usually don’t want to face:

Do I really want to…?

Using the previous examples:

Do I really want to get more clients?

Do I really want to write a book?

Do I really want to change careers?

The next time you are tempted to ask yourself “How can/do I…” remember to instead ask yourself “Do I really want to…”

If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll uncover the real reason(s) you haven’t done what you say you want to do. They will show themselves to you in form of fears, questions about your worthiness of reaching that goal, and your lack of willingness to let go of other things you consider important in your life.

If you really want something, you’ll find a way to get it. Or, at the very least, you’ll start playing with the possibilities. Possibilities are endless! And you know it. Telling yourself that you don’t know how to do something is just an excuse that allows you to continue to avoid pursuit of your goals.

I want to be clear: I’m not saying that you should never ask yourself how to do something. However, I think it’s important to say that if you aren’t pursuing your goals because you tell yourself that you don’t know how to, you’re making excuses. Because you have infinite resources and creativity inside of you,. a list of different possibilities should come to mind naturally when you ask yourself how to do something, leaving you to choose the one(s) you want to start with. So, if that’s not the case and you feel stuck, ask yourself:

Do I really want to?